Bren O'Brien at Melbourne Park
The once intimidating theatre of the post-match press conference is in danger of becoming a total farce as players are bombarded with a host of questions ranging from the inane to the ridiculous.
Andy Roddick's dog, Andy Murray's dalliance with Bikram yoga, Serena Williams' bling, Nikolay Davydenko's talent on the Playstation, the colour of Maria Sharapova's dress, Carsten Ball's godfather and Katie O'Brien's love of baked beans and tuna are among the bizarre topics explored by the media throng in press conferences over the first two days at Melbourne Park.
A lot of it is driven by the celebrity culture that tennis players now find themselves immersed in, while some of it makes little or no sense at all.
Sharapova and her fellow tennis pageant queens are fairly used to prompts about their choice of fashion. A careful mention of a designer in the context of a post-match press conference could be worth millions.
Sharapova has been the pioneer of the model tennis player and I'm not talking about role model. Being statuesque as she is, why wouldn't you hang a dress on her while she is exposed to an international TV audience?
But more and more players are finding that they can multiply their incomes by dividing their time between fashion and tennis. The baseline has now become a catwalk, and the men aren't missing out either.
After defeating Sharapova on Monday - possibly the best win of her career - the talk for Maria Kirilenko was not of whether the win would be a coming of age for a promising tennis player. Instead it was whether she liked her opponent's dress - she responded that it looked like Powerade - now that's product placement! She was then asked if the reason that her and doubles partner Flavia Pennetta broke up their partnership was because they were too beautiful.
Williams is the world's No.1 tennis player and defending champion and after speaking at length for the first time on her extraordinary outburst at the US Open, she was ripe for some further inquisition. This is how it followed:
Q."Stunning jewellery you wore on court today. Dazzled the photographers in the sunlight. Is that a Celtic design on the necklace, a special present?"
Hard-hitting stuff! They were real diamonds and all.
Poor old Carsten Ball. Such was the media scrutiny on him after he coughed up a one-set lead against world No.9 Fernando Verdasco he forgot who his godfather was. He doesn't think that it's John Alexander, but he's not sure.
Q. Is J.A. your godfather?"
CARSTEN BALL: "To be honest, I don't know. I'd be a little scared if he was."
Q. "Someone told me he was."
CARSTEN BALL: "No, he could be. Why not? I love JA, so..."
OK, so after that powerful exchange we are none the wiser on Carsten's secondary guardianship.
Apparently Davydenko could never be mistaken for the poster child of celebrity culture either.
Q. "Since you won the Masters, are you more recognized in the street? Do you sign more autographs?"
NIKOLAY DAVYDENKO: "I hope not. Then is not so many like say celebrity guys. I am not Paris Hilton. I don't want to be like this."
I'm sure 'Aussie' Paris - she did once date that Millsy guy - is breathing a sigh of relief on that one.
Rising British star Katie O'Brien is carrying all the expectation