24/12/2008 2:06 PM
It appears form rather than retirement is shaping as the biggest hurdle facing the career of out-of-form opener Matthew Hayden.
Hayden stressed on Wednesday that he was still enjoying his cricket, saying he was not 'anywhere close' to retirement, nor, significantly, had he looked ahead to next year's tours of South Africa and England.
But with an average of less than 24 in his past seven Tests and without a century since January, Hayden acknowledged he needed to make runs in Melbourne and Sydney or he could be involuntarily retired by selectors.
"If I'm putting up performances it's just a matter of how long I want to play," said Hayden, who has posted six centuries from his past seven Tests at the MCG.
"It's still all about performance. To my mind, as I said at the start, my expectation is that I'm performing every Test match. And if that's not the case then I'm vulnerable like everyone else."
"I'm not looking ahead to South Africa or England at this stage. I'm just looking ahead to the next two Test matches, the two most exciting Test matches of the summer."
Hayden said he would have no hesitation in retiring if he was struggling both in and outside the nets, but only the latter was the case at present.
"If I was out in the middle thinking 'gee, I'm really struggling with the bat and really not hitting the ball well, I'm not enjoying it', I guess I'm putting my mind in a position where I'm not anywhere near that right now," he said.
"I'm still enjoying it. I still feel like I'm hitting the ball (well). I still feel like I could have a touch of luck would be nice."
"That's professional sport and that's the sword we dive onto. It's the great challenge that I really enjoy."
"The day that comes when I can come sit here and face you guys and say I don't want to play cricket anymore for Australia, if that's a forced decision then that's a forced decision."
Hayden said he did not feel threatened by the constant conjecture surrounding his Test future but, in a strange sense, was embracing it.
"You feel slightly uncomfortable, slightly uneasy about it but that's part of the great challenge of playing for your country and exactly why I want to play Test match cricket for Australia," he said.
"I think my expectations have been a good measure and held me in good stead for a 20-year career. My expectations are to perform all the time. But you all know you're up and down in the cycle of life and up and down in the cycle of professional sport."